If the person is exhibiting behavior that reveals some past trauma that cannot be remembered or attached to any event, you may want to refer the person to a Christian professional counselor for more lengthy treatment.

While the traumatic event or events can be horrific and the resultant emotional damage overwhelming to the person who is traumatized, healing from the effects of trauma is possible.

Often someone who is traumatized wonders if he is losing his mind or even losing himself. It can be very reassuring to encourage the survivor that what he is experiencing is normal.

The person needs comfort, acceptance, and a nonjudgmental listening ear. He wants to know that you can give him hope. He needs to feel emotionally safe with you as a Trauma Counselling Kelowna.

Losses will need to be grieved and anger experienced in order to move forward.

This can be long-term work and may involve individual or group counseling.

Action Steps

1. Understand the Nature of the Trauma

Discuss what happened if it can all be remembered. Do this gently, as the memories are probably very painful.

Don’t allow for any denials of what happened or of the feelings about what happened. Honesty is key.

This can be begun with the counselor, but may be better continued in a support group of survivors of similar trauma.

Understand that you did not deserve the hurts that happened to you and that you didn’t cause them.

Depending on the nature of the trauma, understand that you may need to erect some boundaries with particular people so that you will not be hurt again.

2. Express the Feelings

Express your real feelings. If you have anger at the perpetrators of your trauma, express it.

This does not necessarily mean confronting them. There are symbolic ways, such as writing letters to perpetrators that won’t necessarily be sent, which can be just as powerful.

If you’re angry with God, express that as well. He can handle it.

If you have grief over a loss experienced through the trauma, express that grief. (For help, see the section on Grief.)

3. Know that you will heal

Healing will come with God’s help.

It is important that you engage in a process where this will be possible, either in further individual counseling or group counseling.

4. Know that you will have victory

Beyond just healing, you will have victory over the trauma. Begin to consider some of the positive strengths you will have in your life as a result of healing from this trauma.

Know that you will eventually be able to forgive in order to set yourself free. That is the ultimate spiritual victory. (For more, see the section on Forgiveness.)

Know that you will be able to be of great comfort to others who experience similar traumas. This is because healthy relationships are the antidote to trauma.